I AM CHANGING!!!

So in case you hadnt noticed, i decided to take a break/hiatus from blogging for a while for a variety of reasons. Quite honestly, things in my world have been a little crazy (not that good kind of crazy) for the past few months. You've all heard the saying 'When it rains, it pours' well lets just say its been raining cats and dogs in my life but the one thing that has kept me from giving up and going completely insane is the clear understanding that EVERY SINGLE THING HAPPENS FOR A REASON! I know this without a shadow of a doubt because this thing I call my life has an interesting way of proving it over and over again.

Most of you should already know by now that I'm not going to go into the specific details of what's happened because I believe at the end of the day, spending time revisiting everything that's gone wrong in my life isnt helpful or important. What's more important is to let you guys know that things have gotten much better and I can see the sun again. I'll also share something that'll give you a glimpse of one of the major things I'm dealing with. The easiest way to explain it is to say I AM CHANGING! It started a few months ago right around my 29th birthday. I started noticing some things about myself and my life that werent working. As I began to examine things more closely, I realized that I'm in the midst of a MAJOR transition. Now dont get me wrong, throughout my life I've grown accustomed to taking risks, making changes and taking responsibility for my actions/decisions.

However, the more time I spent with myself, the more I begin to notice how different the space I'm in now is from previous periods of transition in my life. For example, I've spent the last 10 years of my professional career working in Human Resources. I've always loved it and honestly believed it was what I would do for the rest of my life. The reality is when I was 8 years old, I told my parents and myself that I wanted to be a psychologist. Throughout the years, I allowed outside forces/influences (ie the myth that you have to go to school for 10 years to be successful in the field and psychologist dont make any money) to cloud my judgement and change my view and subsequent pursuit of this dream even though I knew in my heart thats what I really wanted to do.

Fast forward to now and although I still love HR, my heart is telling me to pursue my dream. The universe has a strange way of sending signs/signals that reinforce what you know in your heart but refuse to acknowledge or avoid mostly because of fear. Here's the thing, I've been getting a bunch of these signals/signs over the last year especially since my birthday. When I first saw Dr. Robin Smith on Oprah, I immediately connected with her and it actually scared me because it was like i was looking at a reflection of the person I've always wanted to be. Each time i would see her, I would be plagued by this nagging voice that said 'Bobby this is what you really want to do and you'll never be happy or as successful as you want to be if you dont pursue it' Initially, I tried to dismiss it as a distraction wrapped in what I thought was inspiration and admiration for a wonderful human being. But the voice didnt go away in fact it got louder.

All of a sudden, I began to question the passion I thought I had for HR and realized that my real passion is and has always been helping people see/realize things about themselves that creates the possibility/opportunity to make a difference in their lives. (sounds kinda like a therapist or psychologist right?) I've also had to acknowledge and take responsiblity for the fact that by choosing to pursue a career in HR, I actually took the easy way out because deep down inside, I didnt think I had what it took to be a good psychologist and used the school/discipline excuse avoid taking the risk and pursing my dream. That was a very hard pill to swallow but thats kinda how TRUTH is sometimes. I dont discount or diminish the time I've spent in HR because doing that would discount and diminish the difference/impact I've made in the lives of a lot of people throughout my career. So where do I go from here? I'm still in the process of figuring that out so i dont have an answer right now and believe it or not that is only ONE of many things I'm dealing with as a part of this transition.

What I know for sure is that I'm changing and I'm excited, anxious and slightly nervous about what the future holds for me. Please keep me in your thoughts and prayers as I work my way through this new journey. I've been blessed with WONDERFUL friends who're always there to offer encouragement and support which inspires me to keep going. The message below was sent to me by one of my friends and it was extremely helpful for me so I thought I'd pass it along to you. Finally, I believe with all of my heart and soul that if I can help somebody (whether its one person or five hundred people) my living shall not be in vain.

Stay Grateful!


PRAISING GOD FOR CLOSED DOORS

We need to learn to praise the Lord as much for a closed door as we do
an open door. The reason God closes doors is because He has not
prepared anything over there for us. If he didn't close the wrong door, we
would never find the right door.

God directs our path through the closing and opening of doors. Once a
door closes, it forces you to change your course. Another door closes,
it forces you to change your course again. Then, finally, you find the
open door and you walk right into your blessing.

The Lord directs our paths through the opening and closing of doors,
but instead of praising him for the closed door (which keeps us out of
trouble); we get upset because we "judge by the appearances."

You have an ever-present help in the time of trouble that is always
standing guard. Because He walks ahead of you, He can spot trouble
down the road and set up a roadblock or detour accordingly. But through our
lack of wisdom, we try to tear down the roadblocks or push aside the
detour sign. Then the minute we get into trouble, we start crying,
"Lord, how could You have done this to me?"

We have got to realize that the closed door can be a blessing. Didn't
He say that no good thing would He withhold from them that love Him?
If you get terminated from your job, praise God for the new
opportunities that will manifest themselves: it might be another job,
it might be school.

If that man or woman won't return your call, it might not be them, it
might be the Lord setting up a roadblock (just let it go).

One time, a person had a bank they had been in business with for many
years and the bank told them "No!" to a $10,000 loan. The Lord put in their spirit
to call another bank. That bank gave them $40,000 at a lower interest
rate than the first bank was offering.

We can sometimes trap ourselves in doubt and discouragement through
judging by appearances. Be grateful for the many times our Father has
closed doors to us just to open them in the most unexpected places.

The Lord won't always say in spoken words: "Go to the left, now to the
right" ...sometimes He will just close the doors that are wrong for
you.

Trust in the Lord with all your heart. Lean not on your own
understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him - and He will direct
your paths. (Prov. 3:5-6)